That Lucky Friend | MINDFUL MONDAY

 

I used to know someone who always said “You’re so lucky, because…” whenever someone told something happy. If someone got a job that person would reply with “You’re so lucky to get a job. (I’m not that lucky.)”. If someone got a raise, it was (according to that “friend”) from sheer luck (not because of hard work). If someone could buy/rent a house, the reply would be “you’re so lucky to be able to afford a house”. “You’re so lucky” sounds positive but it really isn’t. I’ll tell you why I feel that way: “You’re so lucky” isn’t something a real friend shouldn’t say to you because it’s a negative response to something positive. Friends should be happy for each other. (Most of the time anyway. We’re not perfect.) The “lucky”-reply isn’t a friend talking, it’s jealousy. By telling someone they’re “so lucky”, you’re playing down the time and effort they put into something. The job didn’t just knock on their door you know. They probably asked, sent out job applications or used their network. As for the raise, you usually don’t “just” get a raise. A raise is for people who work hard and excel. Finally, the fact that someone can buy/rent a house is probably because they worked hard to save money. Unless they stole someone’s money to buy a house, they worked for it and thus put time and effort into it. Compliment their effort. And even if you think someone didn’t put the time and effort into it, can’t you be a happy your friend is happy? I mean, it is your friend, right? There’s a reason they’re sharing their happy news with you. They’re sharing their happiness. What I’m trying to say is: Sometimes it can be difficult to be happy for someone else. Especially when they have something that you’re struggling to have/get at that moment. However, being negative about your friend’s accomplishment won’t change a thing about your own life. Also, by telling yourself your friend he/she is “lucky” (and you are not), you’re only making excuses for yourself as to why you don’t have that job/raise/house/etc. If you’re unhappy with your life, you should take action to change it. It’s not an issue of luck but of perseverance. So next time a friend tells you happy news, be happy for them. Start with a compliment and a smile. And if you feel jealous, make an effort to change whatever you’re unhappy with in your life. It’s not your friend’s fault you don’t have what you want. It’s all in your hands.

2 thoughts on “That Lucky Friend | MINDFUL MONDAY

  1. Zulke mensen kan je beter niet meer in je omgeving hebben 🙁 die afgunst.. zo naar. Het is best wel bizar dat hun eigen gevoel van zelfmedelijden zo groot is dat ze geeneens blij kunnen zijn voor diegene die iets verdiend heeft :/

    1. Ben ik het helemaal mee eens!!! Gelukkig is deze persoon “natuurlijk” uit mijn omgeving verdwenen dus ik hoef er ook niet mee te dealen, maar er zijn genoeg “vrienden” die dit doen. Jammer, want iedereen heeft iets meer van het één en minder van het ander. Het gaat erom hoe gelukkig je er mee bent.

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